


Reassurances

by mayawrites95 (mayarox95)



Series: A Light In The Darkness [13]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (2017), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Fix-It, Kylo Ren Redemption, Redeemed Ben Solo, Redemption, Star Wars: The Last Jedi Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-29
Packaged: 2019-02-18 15:19:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13102977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mayarox95/pseuds/mayawrites95
Summary: Rey and Ben talk about their fears





	Reassurances

**Author's Note:**

> Should be read as part of the series but can be read as a stand alone

Rey took a deep breath as she stood outside Ben's room on the Resistance base. She wasn't all that sure what she was about to do, but she knew she needed to have a talk with him, as per Leia's suggestions.

Which to be fair, they hadn't had any sorts of talks about them or their relationship since he had returned from the First Order. All that had happened was that she and he had shared numerous kisses on various occasions. And honestly, Rey wasn't all that sure what it meant for the two of them.

"I can feel your confusion through the door," she heard Ben say as he opened it, and left her face to face with him. "Is everything okay, Rey?"

"I need to talk to you," she blurted out, and he gave her a confused look. He stepped aside, to let her into the room, and she followed him inside.

"What about?" he asked, as she stood in front of him in the centre of his room.

"I don't understand what is happening between us," she confessed. "I don't understand how we have this bond between us, that's strong enough for me to be able to feel your very emotions as if they were my own. I don't understand how I can feel you so strongly, how it almost is as if you were with me, even when you are not. I don't understand why you appear in front of me through it even when we are on opposite sides of the Galaxy."

She knew Luke was nearly as baffled as they were, and had turned to further Jedi texts to try and find answers. It wasn't often bonds were forged accidently. Bonds were generally there between a master and their apprentice. Not people on opposite sides of the force.

"It's the Force," he said softly, "We forged a bond between the two of us, even if unintentional, which allows us to be able to feel the other through the Force. If it bothers you, Rey, I can try and close it off between the two of us, so that it is not inconveniencing you."

She could sense him tense as he spoke, and she wondered if he believed that she was unhappy with their bond.

"No!" she said quickly. "That's the last thing I want. I might not understand why there is a bond, but that doesn't mean I want it to go away. I just want to know how you feel about it, Ben. I've hardly gotten your thoughts on it. Or on anything else."

He frowned at her, and she blushed, unsure of how to proceed.

"I'm afraid I must ask you to clarify," he said softly. "I don't mind the bond between us. It's what saved me on the First Order ship. It's what made me feel less alone for the first time in years. In fact, I quite like that I am able to sense you through the Force as strongly as I can. However I need you to explain further what you mean by other matters you need my thoughts on."

"We kissed," she said looking up at him. "And I don't even know how you feel about that. Or what it means for us. Or where we are going from here on out. All I know is that I'm terrified every time you go on a mission, even if small, because I'm terrified something will happen to you. I'm terrified the First Order will capture you and punish you for coming home. I'm terrified I'll lose you, and I have no idea how to proceed. I can't lose you, Ben Solo."

Her voice cracked and he looked up at her. He moved closer to her, and took her hands in his.

"Rey, I can't lose you either," he spoke softly, as he cupped her face. "It terrifies me just as much as it scares you whenever you are off saving the galaxy. I know why you must leave, but I hate that I'm not there by your side, fighting with you, even if you don't need me to save you. I care about you, and if anything were to happen to you, I would be wrecked."

She moved closer to him, and she could feel their bond between them, throbbing.

"I want to be with you," she admitted. "It terrifies me, more than you could know. I've never needed anyone in my entire life. I wanted to have someone someday. I wanted my parents to come back for me. And when I was younger I dreamed of falling in love one day. But I never needed anyone, not to survive. I was let down too many times and I learned that I was the only one I really needed to survive."

He stroked her face softly, "But I need you, Ben Solo. I need you more than I know. And I want to be with you."

He pulled her in closely, and his lips met hers. She wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him tightly against her, as she moved her lips against his. He wrapped an arm around her, and she sighed into him.

"I want to be with you too, Rey," he admitted to her. "Even if I don't deserve to have you. I want to be with you."

She smiled, as she held him tightly against her.

"I can't promise you that nothing will happen to me during battles, just as you cannot make that same promise yourself. But I can promise that I will never stop fighting to return home to you. That I will do everything I can to make sure that I survive. I promise that I'll be here for you, as long as you'll have me, and that nothing can take me away from you," Ben promised her, as he kissed her forehead. "I refuse to let anything hurt you, even myself."

"As do I," she murmured. "You've been hurt too many times, Ben, I will not cause you any more pain."

He pulled her in closely and she sighed into him. She knew she couldn't predict the outcome of this war, that the worrying over Ben would never end. But at least she knew that he cared about her just as much as she cared for him.


End file.
